The Voice In My Head


There’s this other voice in my head,
You know the one I mean.
The one that’s always …
            chattering, describing, deciding, commenting, and controlling.
            The one that never … shuts … up!
It’s often not a kindly voice,
Best left to it’s own devices.
To run rampant decisions …
            “I hate this place”, “my shirt’s too tight”, “look at her hair”.
            A maker of ideas all made up!
When I’m trying to have this conversation,
This voice is not a friend to me.

            “I did it again, stupid”, I’m getting fat”, toooo old now”.
I try to notice the voice
to harness its ignorance,
            and it always comes back.
I try to ignore the voice
to give it no validity,
            and it always whispers back.
I try to argue with the voice
to break the oppression,
            and it always hits back.
I try, I try, I try … then cry.
The voice in my head never gives up.
It pretends to be nice to me.
Rationalizing, psychologizing, euthanizing and fantasizing,
A congratulations is due up
Cheering on negativity.
What has the voice in your head said to you lately?

(originally written Aug 2009)

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